Friday 29 November 2013
As I sit in front of my computer and stare at the
blank document with that annoying cursor that is continuously blinking in front
of me, I wonder and wander what to write and share to the rest of the world. But
mostly, I am thinking about what I will tell you.
You see,
there are a lot of things that I want to tell you. But I don’t know where to
start and how exactly I am going to tell you. I want to say it in a way that
you will understand –maybe not today but someday. Someday when you finally figure out how to
navigate your way into this place you now call home. Into the life that you are
unfamiliar with but will later call your own. Someday when that frown and
confusion will turn into smile and realization. Someday when you are the one
sitting in front of the computer and thinking about what you will tell them.
If I am
going to tell you something, it might sound like this.
I will tell
you that it is okay to be nervous on your first day of school. It is okay to
feel that heart pounding against your chest. Take a deep breath. Close your
eyes. And remember, that you are not first person that felt that way. And if
they survived their first day – you will, too!
I will tell
you not to feel awkward and perhaps a little embarrassed about your accent. It
will always be a part of who you were, who you are and who you will be in the
future. It will always be a reminder of a place you once called home, a part of
your identity and something that makes you even more special.
I will tell
you that as you adapt into the new ways of living in your new home, you may or
may not have a lot of questions about your identity. You may question who you
will give your loyalty to. You may or may not question where you stand and
where you really want to be. So I will tell you, you don’t have to choose. You
can have the best of both worlds. You can love both without being guilty. You
can love your home country and your new home at the same time. No one will take
that away from you because that will always be a part of you.
I will tell
you that as time passes by, you will have a lot of experiences –good and bad.
So the best thing that you can do is take something from it, learn from it and
use what you have learned as you move forward.
I will tell
you, that someday, you are going to look back and realize how far you are from
where you started. And you may be confused right now, but I will tell you, it
gets better.
But the
most important thing that I will tell you is that it is always up to you. No
matter what I say or what other people will say, it is up to you to make the
best of everything around you. It is you and only you that will decide what to
make of and do with what you have. It is up to you to paint the world as you
see it fit. It is up to you to decide where you want to be and who you want to
be. It is up to you to become the best version of yourself and embrace the
experiences you will have along the way. It is you who can tell what you can
and what you cannot do.
As I look
up and read what I have written – or typed, I realized that I have a lot more
things to tell you. But if I will tell you something, it will definitely sound
like this.
- Janine
- Janine
